The secret to success? It starts with your self-talk

New mindset new results (words)
Bryony O'Kane
Fri 07 Feb

This year’s got your name on it. You’re ready to propel your business to lofty new heights, and you’ve set some serious goals to prove it. 

You’re productive. You’re proactive. You’re procrastinating. 

Because it’s already February and you’re starting to lose momentum. Are all those goal-setting blogs and vision board videos that are flagged in your gmail, helping or hindering your success? 

Well, a bit of both. 

As you fill out your Goaldigger planner and stick your dream house to your vision board, what’s that voice in the back of your head saying? Is it with you or against you? 

It might be the same voice that told you not to bother with that networking event because no-one will go on a Monday night

Or the voice that reminded you can’t compete with the big players, because you don’t have a big marketing budget.

Or the voice that reassured you that you’re not staying in your comfort zone, you’re just realistic about what you can achieve. 

The truth is, what we tell ourselves matters. The voice that lets you off the hook from pushing yourself further, is the same one that’ll say ‘I didn’t want it anyway’ when 2030 rolls around. 

If you’re really ready to next-level your business, you need to start with your self-talk, because the actions we take (or don’t take) are determined by how we talk to ourselves every day. 

Reprogramming your mind for success might sound like the self-help book title of the year, but if your body responds to the thoughts you think  - and your thoughts lead to the actions you take - and your actions lead to achieving your can start to see how each part is dependent on the one before, like a giant Jenga.

Negative self-talk isn’t always honest. Your brain will tell you what it thinks you want to hear, as a defence mechanism born out of fear. Fear of rejection. Fear of failure. Sometimes just fear of making small talk. 

But when you start to interrupt those negative thought patterns and limiting beliefs that are holding you back, that’s when everything changes. That’s how to get your mind on your side. That’s when goals are smashed. That’s when vision boards work. 

The mind will tell you what it thinks you want to hear, it’s your job to let it know what you really want. Teach it the new rules - that from now on your self-talk will be empowering. That internal voice is a fearless go-getter and that your goal planning is backed by wholehearted faith that you will get this sh*t done. 

So, how? 

The process is simple, but it’ll take dedication:

  1. Recognise when you have a negative dialogue with yourself. When does it tend to crop up? How does it make you feel? Learn to recognise the triggers and then journal, or write them down. 

Example: “I’d love to do an Instagram story, but I’m no good at putting myself out there on social media”

  1. Once you recognise negative self-talk, think about what you would prefer to think instead. What would be a more empowering way of phrasing that thought? 

How about trying “No-one can talk about my business better than I can, I can make a real difference, people deserve to hear what I’ve got to say”

  1. Now get repetitive with it. Every time you hear the negative self-talk, counteract with your empowering statement. The mind learns by repetition, so the more you do it, the more you’ll rewire your brain to believe it. 

Remember that changing the habit of a lifetime isn’t going to happen overnight and your brain is not deliberately trying to hold you back, it’s simply doing what it believes you want. Change what you tell yourself and your brain will start to believe your new, empowering self-talk. 

If you’d like to delve deeper into how to reprogramme your mind and level up your self-talk for success in 2020, I’m co-hosting a mindset hypnosis session and workshop this month, for business owners who are looking to supercharge their year, both professionally and personally. 

2020: Now What? Marketing Hacks & Mindset Hypnosis to Supercharge Your Year - find out more here.


By Bryony O’Kane. 

Bryony O’Kane is a Mindset Coach & RTT Practitioner. She guides people through hypnosis to get to the root of their challenges and interrupt old subconscious patterns and limiting beliefs that are holding them back. She teaches people the power of self-talk and how to get your mind on your side.